WHAT I WANT...

Is a waiter to take my order without becoming my new best friend.
Address me as Mr…..(almost blew it there) Rumpole. And I will reciprocate by using their last name .

I don’t care to know the brand of organic fertilizer used to grow the potatoes. Starbucks is now telling me on what day they roasted the coffee. Just pour the damn cup and leave some room for sugar and let me get on with my life.

I don’t need to know the temperament of the chef, and I don’t care how long the tuna is fire-roasted for. Just cook it and put it on the plate. I don’t discuss the intricacies of cross examination or how I prepare an opening with my clients (“This opening was first used by the Gustav defense in 1967 and it has changed slightly over the years based on the changes in the self defense laws…”) and I really don’t care how much butter is in the roux.

I don’t care what the waiter’s favourite dish is. I am assuming if it is on the menu, it is because they think it is good. And most importantly, there is a special place in hell, with no tips, reserved for waiters who linger and wait until you take a bite of food before rushing over to engage you in conversation about the meal. I don’t wish to share my dinning experience with the wait staff. I really don’t wish to speak with them at all beyond the order. And while we’re talking about the staff, I really don’t care for their snide looks when I turn down a $30.00 bottle of water. I know the water scam and I’m not about to fall for it. I don’t mind paying a small fortune for a lobster, but I’ll be damned if I’m going to spend a hundred bucks on something that runs from the taps for free.

If I don’t eat all the food it’s not because I didn’t like it, but because they have served a side of beef big enough to feed a town in Somalia. I can’t stand it when I’ve eaten a reasonable amount from my plate and the entire contingent of waiters rushes over as if I’m choking and need the Heimlich. Trust me, if I don’t like something, I’ll let them know about it.

Just take my order and leave me the hell alone.

VOIR DIRE FROM HELL

UPDATED: A day in the life of the REGJB. Below.

The Scene: A modest courtroom on the fourth floor of our little building.

Judge Reemberto Diaz and a group of hardworking prosecutors (Gayle Levine headlining) and defense lawyers (Dan Lurvey, Ken White, Bruce Fleisher, and ??) are slogging their way through panel after panel of jurors.

Two defendants face the death penalty. Four criminal defense attorneys and two prosecutors pose endless questions to jurors, some of which are being questioned well into the evening hours when Rumpole prefers to be home sipping a glass of Chateau Miami River.

Just how long can this last?

No truth to the rumor Nightline on ABC will be running a "jurors held hostage day__" report every evening.

And while it pains us to do it, (give any of our robed readers credit) lets give Judge Diaz some credit here. He is in an election cycle and Friday at noon is the filing date. While many of his colleagues are out pressing the flesh, glad handling lawyers they would otherwise never give the time of day to, Judge Diaz is working a very difficult case. Judge Diaz came to the bench as a well respected attorney and he has not disappointed either side in his fairness and ability to run his courtroom. We are confident he will be reelected without opposition.

See You In Court, where voir dire past 7PM should be a crime.
And for those of you who practice in federal court, yes the rumors are true. There are actually courts in this country that give you more than "8 minutes 11 seconds" for voir dire. (And we have taken that quote from one of our last federal cases, where we had a rather difficult time suppressing the overwhelming urge to say "you've got to be kidding me.")

UPDATE. A reader sent in this comment to complete the picture of our humble little courthouse today:

Wonderful and true post about Judge Reemberto Diaz. But did you have too much Chateau Miami River to move through REG? In fairness to other floors/judges at REG there's Judge Stan Blake holding a meeting at 5:30 about setting up 'drug court' in the divisions where the judges themselves have not done so, Judge John Schlesinger in a trial with a difficult pro se defendant-where rumor has it Faretta has been repeated every 5 minutes, next door is Judge Dava Tunis doing Arthur Hearings and Frye hearings all afternoon, Judge Glick trying a trafficking case as a back-up judge always ready, willing and able to work, Judge William Thomas who sends out emails to volunteer to try any judges case (just as Judge Julio Jimenez does almost weekly), Judge John Thornton who closes out 150 cases in 4, yes that is 4 days, ( a plea blitz in Leesfield/Tunis that lasted 9 hours with the judges bringing in food), Judge Soto who is ALWAYS working and is awesome as administrative judge when Judge Blake is out donating an organ or 2. Now what's going on in the county north of the border in criminal court? Come on people; we actually have judges at REG that spend time and DO SOMETHING about issues like a separate attorneys line to get into the building and a window at the clerks office (Judge Sam Slom). Can anyone in Dade ever admit that anything is okay and that many judges-while imperfect-actually try and work hard?The post on Judge Diaz is true and well deserved. Finally some positive comments. Those of you whose lives stay at REG have NO idea what judges can and are like in other counties, let alone other states and jurisdictions. Finally Rump, something positive. All the negativity becomes passé, as they say across the pond.

And then this comment from a fan of county court:

Anonymous said...
Let's also give credit to our County Court judges. Arzola, Krieger-Martin & Ortiz were all in trial and that was just the 5th floor's count.

Rumpole replies: well said. We grudgingly admit we have some hardworking and talented judges. But we just don't like to say it very often.

FBI ARRESTS 2 CITY OF MIAMI OFFICERS

And no, the Chief, who just recently admitted to "wrongdoing" was not one of them.

Officers Geovani Nuñez and Detective George Hernandez were arrested, according to the Herald, HERE
for offenses involving "drugs" and "stolen merchandise", but not "stolen drugs" as there is indeed, apparently, honor among thieves, even those that wear a badge. Allegedly.

Michael Catalano for the defense of Officer Nunez. A first appearance before a Federal Magistrate today at 1:30 awaits the accused.

We dryly note that the Feds seem to like arresting our clients on federal matters around 4:30 on Fridays, keeping them at FDC until Monday. Somehow, the FBI decided a Thursday arrest was in order in this matter.

We're guessing it was just luck. Right.

See You In Court Monday.

STUART MISHKIN HAS PASSED AWAY

Stuart really deserves his own post. If you wish to comment on the PD and SAO budget crisis and impending cuts, go to the post below this one.


Sad news reaches us, apparently confirmed, that longtime REGJB Lawyer Stuart Mishkin has passed away. Stuart was a former prosecutor, and good friend to many lawyers, court reporters, Judges, and court staff. Stuart Mishkin passed away after a long brave fight. Those of you who were Stuart's friends, knew that at least two years ago, despite a grim diagnosis, Stuart kept working and surprised his doctors. Stuart Mishkin was part of a different era. He was a lawyer when Miami was changing from a sleepy southern tourist town, to the high powered, cocaine fueled, exploding metropolis of the "Miami Vice 1980's". Stuart was here when it all changed. When we think of Stuart, we think of other old-time lawyers like Max Engle, Paul Pollock, Sy Gaer, and of course his longtime former partners Steve Golembe and Ken Weisman. Stuart left his mark on countless clients and friends, and he will be missed and remembered.

Jonathan Davidoff wrote this:
Stuart Mishkin was a great guy. As a former ASA and presently a defense attorney, it was always a pleasure to work with Stuart.Just two weeks ago, I saw Stuart on the third floor running around with a giant smiling on his face. Stuart told me he was dying, but enjoying every day without concern for the future.As a prosecutor, Stuart annoyed me with a smile, but was always respectful and kind. When I started in private practice, Stuart always offered advice, assistance and offered cases. Stuart will be greatly missed, not as an attorney, but as a person!
Jonathan Davidoff

Stuart's former secretary Janet, wrote this:
I had the honor of being Stuart's secretary for 13 years. I was saddened when Maria told me the news of his death. Stuart was so dedicated to his work...he lived for the office. He loved to kid people and talk, talk, talk. He was truly one of a kind. You are in my thoughts. Goodbye old boss.

And Stuart's friend and colleague Judge Lenny Glick, wrote these wonderful words:
I am saddened by the passing of my friend Stu Mishkin. We started at the State Attorneys Office in 1972. I went to his wedding, knew his family and remained friends over these many years.We were trial partners on a few cases,in the early days, and he tried cases before me over the past 17 years that I have been a judge. Like the Sy Gaers of our business his word was his bond. He was an attorney who really cared about his clients while being very realistic about how our business is conducted. Never afraid to go trial but understanding the risks. He had a unique appeal with jurors because he always presented reasonable alternatives to the prosecution case. He will be missed for his sense of humour, his humanity and his humbleness.We who knew him need to reflect on what is important in life. Family,friends,honor and integrity and then work.

The "job", whatever it is we do, comes last, all other things come first. Stu personified the legacy we all strive for:
Did his work with dignity and ethics.
Good lawyer who cared.
Loved life and family.
Was a friend who could be counted on.
Didn't take himself to seriously.
Tried to make a difference.
We will miss him but he will be remembered.

A friend, Lenny Glick

THE PD'S OFFICE IS.....

CLOSED!!!!??????
(updated below and here: Sad news reaches us, apparently confirmed, that longtime REGJB Lawyer Stuart Mishkin has passed away. Stuart was a former prosecutor, and good friend to many lawyers, court reporters, Judges, and court staff.
Stuart Miskin passed away after a long brave fight. Those of you who were Stuart's friends, knew that at least two years ago, despite a grim diagnosis, Stuart kept working and surprised his doctors. Stuart Mishkin was part of a different era. He was a lawyer when Miami was changing from a sleepy southern tourist town, to the high powered, cocaine fueled, exploding metropolis of the "Miami Vice 1980's". Stuart was here when it all changed. When we think of Stuart, we think of other old-time lawyers like Max Engle, Paul Pollock, Sy Gaer, and of course his longtime former partners Steve Golembe and Ken Weisman. Stuart left his mark on countless clients and friends, and he will be missed and remembered.)

The rumor we are hearing is that very shortly because of the infamous budget cuts, the Public defenders, those champions of altruism and defender of those who no one else will defend, will very shortly be telling judges (politely we hope for their sake) that they can no longer accept appointments on new cases. The halls of PDs office are full of rumors of impending layoffs, attorneys being furloughed, no new lawyers or support staff being hired. It has not been the most pleasant place to work lately.

So, Mr. Martinez, as some of our favourite judges like to say "what say you?"

Are you guys putting up the shutters and closing the door and turning away the poor, the weak, the wretched refuse of Dade County. Has rain and sleet and gloom of no money forced the PDs to abandon the swift completion of their appointed cases? (Why are we quoting so many verses from words etched in stone in NYC?)

See you in court, where we often ponder the oath of admission to the Bar of Florida, in which, inter alia, young lawyers are required to swear that they would never turn down a case because of money.

Update: ASA David Ranck's "documents blog" getting some outside publicity:RANCK

THE CAPTAIN REPORTS:

ELECTION UPDATE .....

With election season in full gear, we can accurately report that we have been flooded with emails and snail mail items all inviting us to campaign fundraisers all over town. As reported on May 2, 2008 on this blog, there are nine contested races here in Miami-Dade County; eight in the Circuit Court and one in the County Court.

Beginning today and continuing each and every Wednesday, we will attempt to provide you with a weekly contest overview and then let you have at it and give us your opinions on why we should or should not vote for a certain candidate.

Let's begin with the lone County Court contest, in Group 42. The candidates vying for the seat are Incumbent Norma Lindsey and Challenger Lisa Lesperance.

NORMA LINDSEY .....

Judge Lindsey presently resides at the Gerstein Justice Building. In 2005, she was nominated by the JNC and Governor Bush appointed her to the bench in November of that year. She did not have to run in 2006, so this is her first time with her name on the ballot.

Lindsey graduated from Marshall in 1987 and went to law school at the University of Miami. She received her JD in 1993. For the first six years of her legal career, she was in private practice handling commercial litigation. In 2002, she became Associate General Counsel to the Boys & Girls Club of Miami Dade County. She was also a member of the 3rd DCA JNC.

An interesting note about Judge Lindsey; she earned a track and field scholarship, (she excelled in the high jump) to Marshall.

You can read all about Judge Lindsey on her web site at retainjudgenormalindsey.com.

LISA LESPERANCE.....

Ms. Lesperance graduated from the University of Florida in 1987 and went on to obtain her JD from St. Thomas in 1993. She has maintained a private practice for more than 14 years. She handles all types of cases, but concentrates on family law and criminal defense. If you are a frequent visitor to the Gerstein Justice Building, you probably have run into her brother Robert or her father Lou. With the passing of Sy, Lou probably holds the banner right now as the "oldtimer" in the building.

This is the first run for office for Lesperance. You can read all about Lisa on her web site at voteforlisa.net.

Please do your homework on the two candidates. Help out our readers by giving us your comments, pro and con, on your experiences appearing before Judge Lindsey and with anything you know about Ms. Lesperance.

The election takes place on Tuesday, August 26, 2008.

CAPTAIN OUT .........

BUSY

Talk amongst yourselves. Be nice. Lots going on. Rumpole is very busy at the moment.

The down escalator from 2 to 1 is fixed so of course they now take the up escalator from 1 to 2 out of service. Why do they taunt us like this?

Did the new plan to reduce traffic to the building work today? It seemed the lines to get into the building were shorter. However some Judges were grumbling so we hear.

See You In Court when we get a moment to come up for air.

P.S. To re-iterate our policy: When we ban someone from the blog, that means we don't discuss them anymore, and in this particular case, it means we don't let them post their 45 motions and 12 new lawsuits a day in the comments section. (Perhaps we have under estimated the number of lawsuits a bit, but you get the ide.) So if this particular person gets suspended or disbarred or wins a lawsuit and gets the Bar disbarred, we care not. We have washed our hands of him and his warped view of the world. Go read the game politics web site (the link is above) , whose readers revel in this attorney's misfortune.

SY GAER DEDICATION WEDNESDAY AT 12 NOON

The signs are up at the Justice Building. 12 Noon on Wednesday we dedicate the memorial to our departed friend and colleague Sy Gaer. Try to be there. In memory of Sy, it promises to be a good time with fun memories. Sy would have wanted people to laugh and remember the good times.

SIGNS OF THE TIMES?

Speaking of signs, those of us who have traversed the hallways and by-ways of our Justice Building (Motto: "The REGJB may be old, but at least it's open." See, In Re: Miami Federal Courthouse Fiasco, 111 Waste Of Money, 666 (2005-2008) ) have noticed this week that once again the escalators are on the fritz. First it was the first floor "Up" escalator, and then yesterday and today it was the second floor "down" escalator.

More disturbing, and you can see this for yourself, is the printed and framed sign, standing in its own metal frame, on the first floor of the REGJB, proclaiming that the escalator is broken and to use the stairs. What this means is that someone realized that the escalators would be broken so often, they went to the time and expense of purchasing and framing a sign for weekly use.

At least our elevators are swanky.

And speaking of both Federal Courts, ("Casa De Moreno" A&B) at least our elevators work.

BURGER BLOGGERS FIRED
The Herald reports HERE
on a Whopper of a story. Burger King Corp. has fired two employees for participating in a blog that contained content criticising a migrant farmer advocacy group.

JUDGE ORDER'S INVOLUNTARY APPOINTMENT OF ATTORNEY
HERE

The Scene: Manatee County.
Dramatis Personae: Attorney Joseph Campoli, Manatee County solo practitioner; Johnny Vasquez- defendant in an organized fraud RICO case; The Honorable Lee Haworth, Chief Judge for Manatee County.

Summary of events: Manatee County has the biggest criminal case they've ever seen. RICO charges for 14 defendants and counting . Manatee County has between 5 and 15 lawyers on the Court registry willing to take court appointments. There are no lawyers available to take the appointment to Mr. Vasquez's case.

In an extraordinarily well researched and soundly written opinion, Judge Haworth lays bare all the inequities and problems with JAC. From the low fees, to the blatant attempts to avoid paying bills by rejecting over 95% of them for petty reasons, Judge Haworth resorts to some very sound reasoning as to why he is forced to take extraordinary measures. His critique of the low fees paid to private counsel is well documented and very persuasive.

It is a lengthy order but well worth the investment of time.

See You In Court, avoiding Manate County at all costs. Wander up there and before you can leave you may be ordered to take a defendant in a RICO case that could last years.